Countdown To Esmeralda Bay is a late-1980s drama/ action film regarding arms deals/ government corruption in a Central American country. It’s one of the few films in this genre helmed by Jess Franco, who is more known for sleazy and horror-bound fare. Here from the folks at Fullmoon Productions is a Blu-Ray release of the film.

Countdown To Esmeralda Bay( aka La Bahía Esmeralda, Esmeralda Bay) was made in 1988, but didn’t appear until the year 1990. It was a Spanish/ French production- released jointly by  Eurociné & Lluria Films.  It was the only Franco film released in 1990- though in 1988 he released Faceless & Dark Mission: Evil Flowers.

The first ten minutes or so of the film take part in a difficult-to-see light- I’m guessing it was day-for-night-shoot, but it’s very difficult to figure out who is who, this isn’t helped by the very poor audio- so you often find it difficult to hear what is been said. A boat is coming in with boxes full of guns on, and it gets set upon by a group of soldiers who steal the weapons. In one of the vehicles involved with the theft is Lina(Silvia Tortosa), who we find out sooner enough is the wife of tubby, ragged grey-haired, shell-suited Wilson( Geroge Kennedy)- who has brought the guns, and she is double-crossing him.

We also have moustached/ slightly browned-up(!) Madero(Robert Forster) the general in charge of the Central American island the film is set on- he's into all manner of corruption/dodgy dealing. He’s also sleeping with Lina- who spends part of her time working at whore house run by none other than Franco regular/ mews  Lina Romay, though she only has a few brief scenes.

I have to be frank/ honest Countdown To Esmeralda Bay certainly stands as one of the most ham-fisted filmed/ edited films I’ve seen from Franco- and add to this it’s one of his most ponderous/ boring films too. This is coming from someone who must have seen coming on for one hundred plus Franco films, and for the large point I either enjoy or am fairly taken by most of his output.

The film runs at one hour and thirty minutes- but feels easily like two hours plus. It’s badly/ confusionally edited, we have a fair bit of stock footage dotted about, and as for the action elements, these are badly executed/ at points laughable. And the thing is it can’t even be called it’s-so-bad-it’s- great, as the whole plot/ flow of the film shifts between being boring & confusing.

Mixed in the largely bland/ bad cast we have another Franco regular Antonio Mayans as the local persist- but again he’s given little screentime. All I can imagine is that the film had a major studio intervention- as there are only a few touches of Franco flare, and is largely just a badly shot/ generally badly conceived drama/ action film.

Moving onto this new Blu-Ray, the scan(aside from the mentioned nighttime scenes) is good enough in its clarity/ depth. As with most of Fullmoon releases, this is a barebones affair- with the only thing found here being a selection of trailers.

Countdown To Esmeralda Bay is just plain bad, and is only advised for Franco completist who must see everything he’s mad. I guess I’m sort of pleased I watched/ struggled through it- but boy I won’t be watching it again…I hate to be so bluntly negative, but I have nothing positive to say about the film.